Miscommunication: The Invisible Barrier Holding You Back
We all want to be heard, understood, and respected. But what if the biggest obstacle to achieving that isn’t external—it’s us?
As individuals, we often stand in our own way. We overanalyze how we look, how we sound, and how others might be judging us. We become so focused on ourselves that we lose sight of the most important part of communication: the other person.
The Favorite Topic: Ourselves
It’s no secret; our favorite topic is us – whether we’re willing to admit it or not. We’re constantly assessing how others perceive us:
Do I sound confident?
Do I look professional?
Did I say that the right way?
We often think that trying to meet others’ expectations means we’re ignoring our own needs, but it usually just makes us worry about what people think. This cycle of self-judgment can stop us from really paying attention to others or being curious about their point of view. When we get stuck like this, it’s tough to truly connect.
For me, I refer to this as “The loop of Judgement under the disguise of Selflessness”
The Shift: From Self to Audience
The key to breaking this cycle is shifting our focus. This requires getting comfortable with who we are: the good, the not so good, and everything in between, by doing this we free up the mental space to truly focus on our audience: what they need, what they care about, and how we can serve them through our message.
Here are three powerful ways to make that shift
1 - Acceptance of Ourselves
Start by embracing your strengths, your quirks, and even your imperfections. Confidence doesn’t come from being perfect, it comes from being authentic. When you accept yourself, you stop performing and start connecting.
Reality check: Easy to say, challenging to achieve, it is certainly attainable. It’s a journey and one I’m very familiar with 😉 I’m happy to connect and discuss.
2- Intention of Your Message
Before you speak, ask yourself: What do I want this person to walk away with?
Clarity of intention helps you communicate with purpose. It also reduces anxiety because your focus is no longer on how you’re being perceived, but on what you’re trying to convey.
Reality check: This takes time and patience, and practice is the key.
3 - Awareness and Curiosity of Your Audience
Great communicators are great listeners and patient speakers. Be curious. Pay attention to body language, tone, and engagement. When you tune into your audience, you naturally become more responsive, more empathetic, and more effective.
Reality check: practice, practice, practice…. Awareness of self allows awareness and curiosity of others to become real.
Final Thought
You are often your own biggest blind spot, but also your greatest opportunity for improvement. When you take responsibility for your presence and your message, you unlock the power to truly connect. And in a world full of noise, that kind of connection is rare and deeply valuable.
